| [ just some thoughts` ] |
...
a lonely little boy once met a girl...
he went on to know her, and became friends with her...
he got this feeling from her that he couldn't describe...
he thought it was jus a feeling of closeness that he had derived from jus being with her...
going through his thoughts, he decided to dismiss it as "nothing much"...
as he spent more time with her, the feelings grew w/o him knowing...
he observed her...
feeling happy when she was...
and sad when she was too...
the days that she wasn't there...
it would just be boring...
as he delved into his very own thoughts...
he jus stares into nothingness...
desregarding all the people around him...
with all the thoughts going through his little mind...
the thought of her came up, one after another...
never did he expect her to have an impact on him...
everytime he saw her, he didn't know how to start...
he was dumbfolded, lost for words...
as the days passed...
the feelings grew too much to be contained...
he finally got the courage to express his thoughts...
however...
it was like a magazine of bullets being shot into him...
he was left all alone to fend for himself.
he never expected her to leave...
he never wanted her to leave...
he never wanted that kind of cold treatment...
he never wanted anything that would deprive her from happiness.
-----
of all the things that have happened or resulted, he couln't comprehend all of those. never did he think that he would be alone again. never did he dare think of being alone in everything that he does.
no more pain, no more misery, no more thoughts of her.
he just wants to put a stop to his feelings. he didn't want to feel hurt anymore. he didn't expect anything to occur or result. he just wanted her to be happy.
-----
i just realised that 0400 was my good friend...
nvm if no one know who that is, cos tt's not human...
cos it aint...
nvm all the things that occured.
i didn't mean for it to happen, you didn't mean to...
it was just a by-product of life...
all the unhappiness, all the misery...
everyone can live w/o them both in their lifes...
i dont want them to interfere, but they had...
now i'm trying to throw them away, shrugging everything away...
i may be selfish, but i dont want to regret life...
there issn't much to say. i dun know how to start...
i dun wanna say bye forever. it would've been a great regret.
...
dreaming of you` @
12:00
Saturday, September 16, 2006